im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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