We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize