I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
