More tranny stories later!
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
