ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
