You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
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By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
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Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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