he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
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