Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
