Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
