fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize