No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
