i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize