No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
