Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
