Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
23 Medical Examiners Reveal The Most Disturbing Causes Of Death They’ve Seen
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across