do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
