Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
