So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Randomize
