you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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