Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
