a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Randomize
