I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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