I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
