Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize