Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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