you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
