Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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