$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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