who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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