His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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