I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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