just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
