It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
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You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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