do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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