Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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