How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
