and you said cock pushups were impossible
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
