All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
