How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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