I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
