I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I want her autograph on my taint
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize