come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
