its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
