His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
