u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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