Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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