ugly people sure do ruin things
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
