she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
