eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Randomize
