quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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