Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
